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Interesting composition. I think the production sounds a bit weird due to the drums being solely over to the left. Other than that it's got a very 70s rock feel about it.
your voice sounds like tom petty
I didn't think the prechorus needed lyrics so if anything, I'd just add a single vocal track over the prechorus anyhow. I think i started messing with the set after the recording of this song. There was already duct tape on the snare and it sounds terrible. i think I just put a compressor on it. I can never really think of a good intro for anything and a lot of my music really reflects my stream of conciousness lyric writing style. The ending makes me think of a cartoon character realizing he isn't on solid ground any longer. I didn't write lyrics for a third verse either. I write lyrics separate from music currently because I can never seem to write unless I'm feeling a certain way and that certain way is fleeting. I've always thought since I was young that a larger, final chorus was cheesy the way you can tell a movie is about to end. My favourite movies always take me by surprise and so, again the ending.
I enjoyed this. Why no vocals over the pre-chrous though? Also, did you consider trying to get different sounds out of the drums using tape, etc? Also, you were probably trying to keep it short, but an intro would have been nice. Allow the listener to settle into that groove, ya know. 2nd chorus need some more intensity in my opinion. And the ending? The guitar solo in this could be considered a bridge, but a bridge to what? The end of the song? Why no 3rd verse? In fact...why not have the guitar solo continue as the band drops back into the verse groove and then have the guitar solo fade out and the 3rd verse begin. Then you can have a big ass final chorus. Just some thoughts if you care for constructive criticism. Good job though.